July 25, 2021

Self Sabotage (2019) - Review

by: Brandon Guiles 

Starring – Jennifer Nangle (Malvolia: Queen of Screams, Irrational Fear)  

Brialynn Massie (Serena Waits, Lilith

Written & Directed by: Brialynn Massie

Produced by: Charles Chudabala, Hunter Johnson, Brialynn Massie 

This is an exciting time for independent horror filmmakers and fans alike. I'm seeing some amazing independent work from so many new and not-yet-noticed directors, including this 2019 short film from Brialynn Massie, titled Self Sabotage.

The film begins with a woman in a bathtub, in some kind of obvious distress. While experiencing visions of a monstrous woman killing her mother, she starts having a breakdown in the tub. This ends with a knock on the door from her mother, who wants to make sure she's okay and ready for their movie night. The woman gets out of the tub and everything seems to go back to normal until she opens the door and sees her mother...

Don't worry, I won't spoil the ending for you.

Being a filmmaker myself, I love seeing this type of artistic horror. While this was shot primarily in a bathroom, it doesn't feel like it. The color palette of grays, blacks, and whites really complement the director's vision of the darkness the main character is traveling through. While some of the shots can be a bit distracting, the overall feeling of claustrophobia and fear is always impressively present. My favorite shot is when the monster's outstretched finger reaches for the woman as she's trying to turn the faucet on. I thought to myself, "Whoa, that's a good shot!"   


Self Sabotage already took a few festival prizes in 2019 and will likely make it into a lot of horror film festivals this year. I'm looking forward to future work from the young, bright, up-and-coming filmmaker Brialynn Massie. Overall, I give it three out of four stars. Brandon says check it out!

March 20, 2020

We Are All Shunters Now

Issue 6 of The Joe Bob Briggs Fanzine was insanely rushed due to the fact that our printer is shutting down indefinitely because of a little something called a pandemic. As a result of panicked and hurried editing, I completely left out this kick-ass article by Danny Lee (who was accidentally credited as Danny Horn in Issue 5; seriously, what do I have against this guy?!). I'm sharing it with you here, because it's an excellent article and would have (should have) been a fabulous edition to Issue 6. So, give it a read and share the shit out of it, please. Thanks! (Jen)
Society (1989) dir: Brian Yuzna
by Danny Lee (Twitter @FrankNDad) Danny also runs the site www.inchoatus.net
Imagine living in a world of unrelenting paranoia where nothing is as it seems. A world of illusions ruled by shadowy figures, where any moment, beloved friends, family or anyone you thought you knew and loved could suddenly morph into a hideous blob and “shunt” away your life. Such is the world in which our fictional hero, Bill Whitney, finds himself at the climax of Brian Yuzna’s Sci-Fi/Horror gross-out classic, Society. Yuzna’s vision has, in a way, come to pass and is no longer imaginary. It is real and we are living in it. Only WE are the Society and shunting is one of our favorite pastimes. 
A brief recap of the plot may help explain my point. Bill is the son of a wealthy, Beverly Hills family and has emotional problems due to paranoid schizophrenia. He does not trust his family and many of his fellow students and friends. His psychiatrist attempts to assure Bill that all is well. One of Bill’s friends gives him a tape recording of Bill’s sister attending a secret, murder orgy with Bill’s parents, providing proof that Bill isn’t crazy, his family is evil, and everyone IS out to get him. He provides his shrink with the tape as proof of his sanity, but because this is a horror movie, Bill does not do the logical thing and immediately listen to the tape with his doctor. Instead, our gullible hero leaves it so it can be easily substituted with an innocent recording of his family attending a normal party. His paranoia only increases when anyone that tries to warn him of danger falls victim to unfortunate accidents or mysteriously disappears. 
In the final betrayal, Bill is forced to attend an orgy held by Society’s power elite where it is revealed that rich and powerful people aren’t people at all, but a different species that has co-existed on Earth alongside humanity. Assuming human form, this species has worked in the shadows to seize control and there’s nothing we puny humans can do about it. They morph into their true form, a massive, pink, collective blob and the “shunting” commences. Bill’s friend is thrust into the middle of this grotesque orgy of slime while the Society uses their “mouths” and hands to start sucking the life and organs out of him until he melts into the rest of the blob. Not wanting to be “shunted” himself, Bill escapes with the help of one of the monsters that has taken a liking to him. Unfortunately, for the rest of us, the Society is still in full control when the credits roll. 
Pretty gross, huh? Now, while we may not attend slimy blob orgies and devour meddlesome teens, some of us have become quite adept at shunting. Ridiculous you say? Are you part of a Society on, say, SOCIAL media? Have you ever had any long-term friendships negatively impacted or even END due to a single, stupid Tweet, Instagram photo or Facebook post? How many have decided to shut out a parent or child because they fell on the wrong side of the MAGA line? How many of us have morphed into the Society blob and dog-piled a once beloved hero when they had too much Pinot Noir with an Ambien chaser and made the mistake of Tweeting out something best left to the locker room? How much glee and dopamine did it give the blob to shunt them out of existence for a single, misguided SOCIETAL misstep? 
Even our own Joe Bob, a man we love and adore PRECISELY because he’s no bullshit and says the un-PC things that need to be said has been in the middle of the shunting. Our rebellious redneck had the AUDACITY to post a rather innocuous tweet about not thrusting politics into horror movies or, at the very least, have the artistry to keep it in the subtext. Unfortunately, this happened to coincide with the release of the somewhat feminist remake of Black Christmas. Within moments Joe Bob’s Twitter followers, fans and, in the ultimate betrayal, members of the MutantFam, suddenly morphed from loving friends and family into the monstrous blob and shunted the big man like it was their last meal.  
“…He’s not reviewing or critiquing the content of the film. He’s challenging the very idea that movies need perspectives outside his own cis-White-straight worldview…*” SHUNT! 
“It’s like he’s an out of touch old man whose sole pleasure is belittling other people.*” SLURP! 
“I stopped listening to that fool when I found out he was right wing.*” Riiiiiip! 
The man who introduced many us to the insane, subversive, perverse, gory world of horror was, with one tweet, transformed into an intolerant, Alt-Right, out of touch, cis-White-straight, old fool! Decades of goodwill and trust gone up in a few, harmless words on Social Media. The globulous, mob feasted on his soul without a moment’s hesitation. “How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child,” uttered another out-of-touch, old fool who gave his children everything before they turned on him. No mercy, no slack. All are grist for the shunt. Even our long-time heroes. 
So, the next time you feel the need to put the “jerk” in knee-jerk and fire off some mean-spirited Tweet at someone, take a deep breath and just…don’t. Think of that mutated, pink, disgusting blob of heads, genitals and shunting mouths and ask yourself, “Do I want to be a part of that Society?” Or do you want to be a normal, decent human being? Or, at the very least, a member of the MutantFam that remembers the Drive-in Oath? Social media, like Society, is a world of illusion run by shadowy figures. Do we really want to give them all that wealth and power by shunting each other? 
*Quotes are taken from Joe Bob’s America: Only Nazi Misogynists Watch ‘Chopping Mall’ January 15, 2020 www.rebellermedia.com

January 29, 2020

New Interview Up at Haunted MTL


Clickety-click on over to the HAUNTED MTL website and feast your peepers on the interview I did with David Davis, or rather that David Davis did with me. Enjoy!

January 27, 2020

Welcome to Paddy Jack Press!

Hey readers! Guess what? (And don't say "chicken butt.") I’m merging all of my fanzine and personal accounts into one, giant mega-account so that I can spend less time on social media and more time making fanzines! So, from here on out, you will find me on
Twitter @paddyjackpress, and on Instagram @paddyjackpress. Paddy Jack Press is now the superdome that encompasses all of the fanzines I create in my spare time. Yes, all TWO of them! Oh, you weren’t aware that I created more than one fanzine? Well, I do. In addition to The Joe Bob Briggs Fanzine, I am also the creator and editor of The Last Fanzine on the Left, a fanzine dedicated to my favorite podcast of all time, The Last Podcast on the Left. You can find more information about both fanzines at my new mega-super-ultra website, www.paddyjackpress.com. See how much easier that is than listing eight different accounts? Yeah, I think so too.
Oh! And if you’re wondering where the name comes from, it’s a combination of my two favorite cats’ names, Putter Jack and Paddy. Putter (a cuddly tuxedo cat who would press up against my back and nap with me) was named for a character in The Legend of Billie Jean likewise named Putter (played by Yeardley Smith). And Paddy was a soft, smushy, scrumptious, sweet black cat who was named after the character Sirius Black from Harry Potter, whose nickname was Padfoot. So, really, his name was Padfoot, but we called him Paddy for short. They were brothers and they humped each other sometimes. It was a very special relationship and I loved them both so much. I still refer to them as my “soul kitties.” They were about 15 years old when they both died, just a few months apart, three years ago. I think of, and miss them, every day. They were the best cats in the universe, and I’m kind of hoping that invoking their names on this project will make my fanzines the best in the universe too. And, before you ask, yes I’m married and have a human child. I just really love(d) these freakin' cats!